Further notes on education

Had a really 'interesting' moment at Sophia's pre-school yesterday which gave me a little insight on educator attitudes. One of the teachers had taken the kids across to the park to have a bit of fun with a home-made rocket. I'm not entirely sure what they were doing - it can't have been too advanced or crazy because the kids are only four but they were asked to draw about their experience afterwards. Sophia starts to do the scribbly thing she often likes to do...just toddler kind of stuff really. The teacher says to her, 'no, no sweetie -- why don't you draw the rocket.' So Sophia then does the other type of drawing she likes (it's almost split-personality-ish) which is fairly accurate kind of stuff. She draws the rocket with the windows and the sun and the teacher with all her fingers and toes etc.....and the teacher just couldn't believe what she was seeing.

But this is what a parent of a gifted child means when they say, 'they just need a little encouragement.' That little bit of encouragement just to think a little differently can achieve vastly different results. I suspect this is the difference that occurs when they get to school. Teachers that leave the gifted to just do what they do because (being very bright) these kids don't need assistance.....are cheating that child of their potential.

When Sophia was three we decided it was time for her to go to kindergarten for social purposes and because it was a learning environment that might help to keep her little mind stimulated. When we observed one of the teachers telling her off for smudging letters on the board when she was trying to read them, we called a meeting with the teachers and we told them of her abilities. We said that she 'just needs a little encouragement'. I think they heard....'I want you to help me get my kid into university when they're 8'. They were instantly intimidated and kept saying....'children need to play at that age'. We took her out of there because of the number of times we observed Sophia being left to her own devices. They weren't even bothering to encourage her to socialise with the other kids in the end.

Attitude changes when it's a gifted child involved in discussion between educators and parents. The reaction from the educator is either keen curiosity or fear. When a child does things outside the expected outcomes for their age group, the accusation that we are cheating our kids of their childhood by pushing them to learn things they don't need to know yet is often soon to follow. That comes from the idea that 'this is a child that doesn't fit 'the box' and I've got to fix it! These parents must be shown the error of their terrible ways!'

Here's a pearl of insight for that type of educator......gifted kids don't need 'pushing'. They initiate the subject they're interested in themselves. And with a little encouragement, they can fly where ever they want to go.

Children need to play at every age, at any level of development. Where is it written that learning can't be play? Play is learning - is it any different if you're playing with words or playdough? Or both!  Why is it that if a child is three or four....any 'learning' isn't perceived as play? When a child initiates learning about a subject, why discourage them because of their age? Aside from having to restrict age appropriate material, why discourage a passion for learning?.

Some would say let the teachers find out for themselves and then they'll change their attitude. I don't believe that attitude ever changes. What happens instead is that teacher ends up with too much time to damage the passion a child can have for learning before you, as a parent, can find out.

Attitude is everything in my book and doubly important for a gifted child from the very start. I'm still saying...cut to the chase...use the words we're all uncomfortable with and ask your child's teacher straight out - 'what's your attitude to gifted children'. You'll know inside of 30 seconds whether or not they are going to have a chance at meeting your child's educational needs. And when you say, 'they just need a little encouragement', make sure that's exactly what the teacher understands.

 

An odd reaction

In an earlier post, I mentioned being frightened of her abilities. This reaction was all my own and I definitely had to try and come to terms with it on the quiet. I have experienced doubt and ridicule while looking for advice on a number of occasions but I was intimidated by Sophia's abilities well before any of that happened. She was a tall poppy and in my family, tall poppies get cut off at the knees. I was almost ashamed because I knew that to stand out was to be a target. I was afraid of being accused of either being a loopy pushy mother or being proven wrong if put to the test, and made to look silly. All over-pleasing, socially-acceptable sillinesses.

And, to be fair to myself,  I was very much afraid for her. Bright kids get bullied - I've experienced it myself since the day I started school (and so had her father). Bright kids get left to fend for themselves. Bright kids have to settle to make room for others because they've got an advantage etc etc etc. Bright kids often get the rough end of the stick in my experience. I wanted better for her. So I put these fears aside and I decided teach her to that she is fortunate to have these abilities and that all she needed to do was to the best that she was able to do. 

And as for the ridicule....the professional types that do that soon can't help themselves and they've gotta test her. Then they understand. I don't need to push the issue. But that's kind of moot now because we've found its easier to just ask them what their thoughts are on gifted children. You find out what you need to know inside of a minute - they can't help themselves then either.